Stumble, but move on.

Appreciation.

Hi guys I’m just ending the weekend of a long, full week of stay in.

Truth be told, I took my stayout for granted. It was something I never fully appreciated till I lost it. Don’t we all?

During this week I learnt a lot of things though.

For starters, stay in life is not bad. But I learnt to make do with the situation I had and pursue my goals even with the limitations it imposes on my practice or studies. I had to bring in big, bulky bags with all my clothes, my guitar, and my books. It wasn’t pleasant but I got by.

Next, let me go on to some heavier stuff. I saw a few things while staying in that made me learn more about the word appreciation.

I’d like to paint a scene for you now. I was booking out for nights out from my camp, and I saw one of my depot mates at a grilled wall at the side of the guard house, talking to his parents on the other side. He was on stoppage of leave (meaning he can’t book out because he’s being punished) and it was something like 21 days of not coming home. Seeing this kinda made me think of how lucky I was to even get to book out. It was painful for him as I saw the sadness and regret in his eyes as his parents watched and talked to him from the gate. I’d never want the camp to be that kind of prison to me.

As I went about my life in camp, one thing that struck me was how the rest of my friends tried their best to make do with the situation and didn’t complain as much as I did. I find that I need to work on my ability to take shit. That’s how people get by, not by whining and not doing anything about it.Oh well.

And well, I learnt something else too. That, even if people are assholes, you’re still the bigger man if you choose to live and let live.

During my guard duty on Thursday, I encountered two people who wanted to prowl, since they’ve been doing sentry since morning. I had an excuse letter that stated I could not do sentry duty, due to the effect that prolonged standing would have on my legs which have barely recovered from the inflammation they had the previous week. So naturally they should give in to let me prowl.

However they slowly asked me to do a few shifts for them, and promised to come back early from their shift to help me out. I agreed, they never came back.

I was angry, but I couldn’t do anything. That’s when I told myself that it would be wise to just let it be and move on. And that’s when I found peace.

So yeah, I learnt so much in one week. Next week is going to short, but I hope my stayout can be reinstated after the IPPT on Tuesday. Hopefully. Good night guys, I’ll be going about my evening rituals before I book in.

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